how to be a domme Archives | Page 21 of 31 | Femdom Training

Premature Ejaculator

I published a post on 26 October at the request of a very good Domme friend of mine. Her slave, sb, thought he could do without her and told her so. Since then he has only got to see her for one hour up until this weekend, despite so much begging for more attention than that! This weekend he was honoured to spend more time with her. It started with chores including cleaning the toilet. How well he had cleaned the toilet was then tested as he had to eat yoghurt spooned onto the ceramic rim. Later on, without actually being touched, the desperate sb actually had a shameful ‘accident’. So my poor Domme friend appears to have a premature ejaculator as a [...]

Its all in the eyes

When it comes to photos of women, there is a feature which causes the woman to appear profoundly dominant. The look in the eyes. Even when the photo has no other dominance attributes. The expression in the eyes I refer to appears to radiate complete heartlessness, cruelty, selfishness and haughty superiority- all at once. I find it interesting when a Tumblr site has a tendency to such photos. I think indicating the Tumblr site owner shares my view. This is an example site from which I copied the above photos. Source: Ms Scarlet

Cuckolding subjugation

As he must do every morning as I am about to leave for work, bitch-boy was kneeling kissing my boots Thursday morning while I gave him his verbal chore list for the day. While he does so I also like to talk at him for a bit too, to remind him how lucky he is and the huge queue of slaves that would beg to take his place should I dismiss him from service. I forgot that I had not told him anything about the time Lexi and I had spent together last weekend when he was in TSD bondage for almost 6 hours and I mentioned that my six orgasms last weekend on the day she was over, were all amazing. He hesitated [...]

Lexi gets more sadistic with golden showers

It is interesting that my lesbian Play-toy Lexi began visiting to be dominated by me and that will never change. But she is getting so much worse with bitch-boy when she transforms into Governess Lexi. (She will always remain very submissive to me without a doubt though.) An example is pissing on bitch-boy. First she just liked to watch me do this, then she wanted to do so herself while I watched. bitch-boy kneeling in a little ball, his wrists bound behind his back and his rubber collar chained to the walk-in shower gulley outlet. During her last visit, she wanted to have bitch-boy suffer more. She had him laying on his back, face-up, (wrists still tied behind his back). She wanted him like this [...]

Femdom Life: Moving House, Moving On

Wildcard and I just signed a lease on an apartment together. Up until this point, as our relationship got serious, I had simply moved in on top of him (heh), taking my scant possessions, merging them with his: a computer, some clothes, a few personal effects and objects of sentimental value. Escaping my ex and the uncomfortable weight of my family has meant a certain paring down of the self, stripping away the non-essentials, both for the practicality of flight and the psychological comfort of not owning things. Moving together, this way, is a big step. It means, among many things, adjusting to a life that is ‘us’ not a life that is designed to be independent. It means, for him, leaving behind a lot [...]

Degrading by Spitting!

All of my cruel Domme friends and I love to spit into bitch-boy’s mouth and sometimes just into his face. What simpler, easier way can there be to assert the difference in status that exists! Mistress Jane is the best at this and the rest of us aspire to develop her elegant, effective, voluminous style. I am looking for advice. How to produce more saliva? I have seen in Femdom videos that a woman smoking seems able to produce a great deal of spit but as a non-smoker, I cannot use this catalyst. I have seen Dommes in Femdom videos use a lollypop or wine or minty chewing gum but each of these is a flawed tool in my opinion because the resultant saliva must taste quite pleasant. I [...]

BDSM Etiquette: Helpful Hints

As readers may well know, I am a stickler for proper conduct. The following questions come up as common BDSM etiquette problems and I’ve provided some guidelines to ensure excruciatingly correct behaviour at all times. The key to BDSM is of course arbitrary rules provided by fictional persons, traditions practiced purely by inertia and wishful thinking. Q I am a submissive trying to meet people, and a person who I am speaking to has demanded that I call them “Master” or “Mistress”. To be specific, they are neither my Master nor my Mistress, but I want to be sure I am doing this properly. A BDSM is built on tradition, and a submissive must know how to properly comport themselves. If you want [...]

Cruel Xmas presents – update

I have decided it is time to replace his long sleeved, winter, little-girl, sissy dress. (The cut-down elderly ladies’ nightdress.) So for another Xmas present I have ordered two pink fleece, elderly ladies’ nightdresses and I will choose which will be the most humiliating style and fabric once cut-down. He will then spend many hours over the coming Christmas break, cutting it very short, hemming it and then sewing some lovely white lace around the hems and cuffs. Two inch wide lace which I have also bought. What a lovely Christmas break he has to look forward to! The drawing in my 26 August 2013 blog post shows the look I am after for my poor little sissy. My impatience got the better of me and [...]

Reader Letter: How Should My Femdom Act?
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Reader Letter: How Should My Femdom Act?

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Reader Letter: How Should My Femdom Act?

This question comes the way of an unlucky fellow, who wrote to me to get some insight on how exactly he was supposed to expect a dominant woman he was dating to treat him. His first relationship made him feel like crap because of how inconsiderate dom #1 was, but dom #2 just doesn’t unilaterally take control all the time. And, he’s not sure what he even wants, so he’s not sure how to help her help him, or even if that’s backleading? It’s a common question, so I’ll let him share it in his own words. Dear Miss Pearl: I have a few questions if you wouldn’t mind sharing some insight. In the past four years I have slowly come to realize [...]

Things I Am NOT Saying About Professional Dominants

As a follow up to my last post on the subject of dominatrices VS non-professionals, I’ve also been trying to share more of other people’s writings on the subject and make this more of a conversation, including on twitter. And of course I’m getting pushback because people think I dislike or don’t believe in professional dominants. This happens every time you try to talk about the pro/non-pro distinction, so I’m going to try to make a definitive response to the subject right here. Professionals are not fake. Please stop writing to tell me about how they are also all “lifestyle” and real and put their heart and soul into the job. This is not about bashing pros, it’s about making a distinction, and [...]

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