In the early days of our swinging journey, we were friendly with a couple who liked to go to nudist beaches. One time, I got into a conversation with him about a weekend away at a nudist retreat. Back then, I was much less comfortable with my body and being nude in public was something I was very much not comfortable with. I told my friend, “I am a swinger, not a nudist.” 

Fast forward to now. I have spent a lot of time on yachts where clothing is very much reduced. I have explored sensual styles of dance and been to many lifestyle events, in particular, Pineapple camping. I have become much more comfortable in my skin and confident about my body. I am happy to wander about amongst consenting adults, either partially or mostly nude. I also enjoy the feeling of water and sun on my naked body. 

Have I evolved into a nudist? I had not contemplated this fully until recently, when I was invited to attend a New Year’s camping event at a nudist retreat. The Birdwatcher and his wife are long-term nudists and were planning to attend. I discussed my reservations with him when he asked if we would be interested in attending. I have not really ever been to a dedicated nudist retreat before. My experience is based on swinger events and burlesque performances. The expectation of being fully nude the whole time bothered me. I also worried that our swinger activities would be offensive and cause problems with the naturists who weren’t part of the swinger world. 

“What does it matter?” He asked, “We will just have to be more hidden.”

For me, that statement answered the question, “What does it matter?”

Naturists started places like this because they wanted to be free to practice their lifestyle without judgment. These spaces are a place where nudists can enjoy being unrestricted by clothing without being arrested or shamed. They have a right to set the rules in their spaces and enforce these rules among people who use their campsites and resorts. My understanding is that for true naturists, nudity is not sexual. It is about being free of the restrictions of clothing. Being naked is not flaunting your body for others to see and appreciate in a sexual way. Walking around naked at a beach or campsite is not a signal to others that they are looking for sex. 

This is where it matters. Swingers are comfortable being nude and often feel restricted by clothing in the same way as naturists. But at a beach or campsite, they will interact sexually with each other. Flirting, touching, commenting, etc. At a swinger event, this kind of behaviour is accepted, among consenting parties, of course. Consent to be seeing sexual activity from onlookers is assumed and watching is invited. If you don’t want to see people fucking, then you are in the wrong place. Nudity is optional. Many people will wear clothing that is more revealing than they would wear in their everyday life. Revealing suggestive clothing is part of the experience. In contrast, nudists dispense with this.

Unfortunately, there are people, men mostly, who treat both types of places in the same way. They use nudist spaces as a hook up opportunity and frequently make sexual comments or proposition women they find attractive when they are at nudist beaches and camps. At public nude beaches, there is a lot of crossover between swingers and nudists. Swingers frequently visit nude beaches to enjoy watching and being watched. Of course creepy men also visit such places to perve and imagine that they will be invited to join in.

Consequently, some naturists don’t like the crossover. They don’t like the ‘cop out’ of people who wear sarongs and other loose, revealing clothing rather than being nude. They don’t consent to sexual behaviour happening openly in designated nudist places. I recently discovered that swinging is quite common in the naturist community but that it is usually more behind closed doors. This is where the problem lies FOR ME. I am not usually comfortable being totally nude in front of people I have only just met. Even if they are all nude. I LIKE wearing sexy clothing and being flirty. Not knowing exactly who I can flirt with and who is going to be offended by flirting seems just too hard for me. 

The kicker, though, was the idea of having to be active behind closed doors. Of having this pressure to sneak off for a play session. If I had committed to attending this event, I would be happy to embrace their rules and join in the activities being run by the hosts. Making new friends and interacting with a new bunch of people so that I could learn more about their lifestyle would have been my focus. If there is someone who is trying to steer me off for some sexy time, then that is a distraction and will kill the vibe for me. In the same way as the nudists want to have fun and be openly nude, I want to have fun and be openly sexy. I can stay home and keep my playtime behind closed doors. Why would I want to go somewhere else and have to do the same thing? There were no other features of this campsite to make me interested in going there. No spectacular landscape, no amazing swimming hole. So I ask myself the same question. Why go there?

Which leads me back to the original question. Have I evolved into a nudist? The answer is no. I like to visit nudist beaches sometimes. I like to wear minimal clothing when I am adventuring outside. But really I don’t like to be wearing absolutely no clothing. For me, fewer clothes equals more comfort. However, when there are other people around wearing less clothing, I habitually start flirting. I guess it is just my conditioning.  

For the record, we didn’t end up going with The Birdwatcher and his wife to the nudist New Year celebration. We stayed home, did some home improvement projects and spent the evening of New Year’s with some swingers, enjoying swinger activities. 

Happy New Year. Here is to more adventures in 2025.