Trials and Tribulations of a chastity slave – Installment #19

Installment #19 – To Be in Chastity or Not To Be in Chastity?  That is the question (to paraphrase William Shakespeare) – by slaveboy jaime

After many, many months of indefinite, mutually agreed upon chastity, i have ample experience to know what it feels like to be in chastity.

There are times where i treasure this state of service and sexual and physical enslavement to Mistress Ayn.  While in chastity there is a calmness to my life, a sense of certainty or routine.  It is a known good and this condition feels normal.

Yet, there is a growing frustration while in chastity, especially after a recent, albeit rare, command to edge and denial, or the even more rare permission to orgasm.  In addition, there is the frequent pinching or constriction and resulting discomfort when sitting in a chair, getting in or out of a car, tossing and turning in bed, or becoming aroused by something or someone – and these experiences occur frequently during the day and throughout the night.  They are a nearly constant reminder that i am Mistress Ayn’s chaste slaveboy.

The frustration or discomfort from being in chastity is replaced when out of chastity with new sensations.  On rare occasions Mistress Ayn permits the removal of the chastity cage so that i might comply with Her order for some sort of edging.  The edging is often for multiple, consecutive days and with a proscribed length of time for edging.  Yet, in most instances, there is denial awaiting the end of the edging time, then icing Her cock so that it fits back into Her chastity cage.  Rarely is there permission to orgasm, although occasionally a ruined orgasm is directed.  Admittedly, given permission to stroke feels very nice and is very intense.  i am quick to gain an erection and shortly thereafter am on the edge of an orgasm.  Then the truly intense frustration sets in as i am reminded of the command for orgasm denial, but with more time left to edge.

These experiences bring forth the question – Is it better to be IN chastity or OUT of chastity?  Thankfully, that is a question that does not deserve or require an answer for it is a rhetorical question.  The correct question is – How might i serve my Mistress, Mistress Ayn, my Beloved Keyholder?  If it is to be IN chastity for an indefinite time, that is my pleasure in service to Mistress Ayn.  If it is to be OUT of chastity for a period of frustrating edging and denial, that too is my pleasure in service to Mistress Ayn.  It is no longer up to me to make these kinds of decisions about my daily, sexual practices.  Mistress Ayn has assumed control of me as Her slave and my life is enriched because of Her guidance in my personal slave training.